It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
I supernannyed him into submission
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
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