i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
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