..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
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