ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
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