A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
