He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Randomize
