Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
