there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Randomize
