It's Friday. Sex?
i think my mom watched the whole time
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
Randomize
