I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
You are the jesus of drinking
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Randomize
