Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
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