He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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