508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
I currently don't understand fingers.
Randomize
