My brain says no but my pants say off.
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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