my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
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