i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
Randomize
