I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
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