nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
