shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
third nipple confirmed
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
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