Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
I feel great
I just peed on a car
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
