Dude my mom stole all your condoms
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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