We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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