Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
