Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Randomize
