You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
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