Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
