Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
Randomize
