What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
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