So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
We had to coat check the pizza.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
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