ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
Randomize
