I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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