yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
Randomize
