I hope mine doesn't look like that
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
