I wanna passion pit in your ass
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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