May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize