So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
Randomize
