OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
Randomize
