how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
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