Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(207): View more from Maine

they said they heard you say put it in my butt

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(908): View more from New Jersey

I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.

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(716): View more from New York

I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.

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(401): View more from Rhode Island

someone was throwing condoms at us.

(1-401): View more from Rhode Island

no, they just magically show up around you.

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?

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(269): View more from Michigan

He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?

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(773): View more from Illinois

You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING

(1-773): View more from Illinois

Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time

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(302): View more from Delaware

Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.

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(613): View more from Ontario

The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.

(613): View more from Ontario

Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.

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