So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
I bet he comes in French.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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