if i can run in heels then i can drive
They totally botched my boob job. My tits look like they're are winking.
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
