you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Randomize
