Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
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