I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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