it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Just puked most of my soul out..
Randomize
