yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Randomize
