Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize
