I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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