After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
Randomize
