there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
Randomize
